Ancestral Witchcraft & Shamanic Practices: On wildness and women

Wildness isn’t a picture of a white women in boho clothing using a racial slur towards my people to describe what they fucking are not and never will be. We’ve seen the pictures with stupid arse memes describing what a wild woman is not.

The depth you must evolve into and towards when speaking of ancestral witchcraft and shamanic practices is none of the above. That’s white washing of earth practices and the misunderstanding of wildness.

You live the power and depth of mystery and that is an ongoing evolution to stand in the fire of who you are and your own ancestry. It is feeling, expressing, and being all human emotions with fuck all guilt, which includes rage women and I’m going to touch on that again. Ancestral healing work goes hand in hand with ancestral witchcraft and shamanic practices in order to live and pull up ancestral power within the deepest wounds in our lineage. If you’re not emotionally healing, your practice is aesthetic, an image of what witch is not.
Ancestral liberation is emotionally expressing the power which is the freedom of you and your own ancestors and the pain that has been oppressed in your own thread.

This wildness holds fire, darkness, depth and freedom. Much of the time it is tumultuous, and learning to hold and express that fire with no fucks given. That includes rage. People speak of authenticity yet pass consistent judgement on women that have fought to stand in her fire. Wildness is the mystery naked and raw within us. Ever moving, fierce but always loving whether you understand her expression of woman or not.

Don’t even fucking try to shame our rage, and I’m speaking for women of colour. We have so much unvalidated rage and the niceness that white women try and gaslight, guilt and want us to be, is the cunty oppressor within her. There’s a sprinkle of some amazing white women I’m surrounded by, those that have listened and validated my rage wanting to understand. To the rest, unlearn that woman and let’s walk beside one another because black lives matter and being anti-racist is not a fucking trend.

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‘Self Acceptance’

Let’s talk self acceptance for a little bit cause if you’re wanting tip the edge and walk into this deeper and darker place, this is work that needs doing and ongoing presence, and definitely not living a surface level place of convincing yourself that you do. That’s not love, that’s bypassing what needs to be loved.

Self acceptance, I know the term has been thrown around like a fucking  well used vibrator, and it’s much more than saying ‘I acceptance myself’ cause you really don’t know what that means until you unthread the conforming oppressive bullshit women are expected to be, and I want to add there’s different levels of oppression a woman carries for so many factors- race, sexuality, gender identity, disability to name but a few not just being woman. So what I’m trying to point out there’s layers, not this fuck around bullshit you see in most spiritual groups that you ‘love yourself’ and live all the fluffy love and light which not only is it a narrow view of life and a tonne of white privilege, but they’re also placing people in boxes assuming that it’s ‘like this’ which is an expectation coming from their lack of a deepening experience of what life is about but also what real love is.

This bullshit expectation does more harm than good, because while a woman is healing herself and she’s trying to again fit herself in a box she knows she’s trying break out. It’s smeared with a different language and feeds an unhealthy belief that this is the way I have to love myself and if not, I must be doing it wrong.
No cunt can tell you how to love yourself because every person, wounding, trauma and oppression a woman has lived, walks a different self navigation and healing process. It’s deep, because ancestral practice is deep af.
Why a real healer or anyone doing transformative work  moves with the individual rhythm of each person.
There’s no one size fits all.

So saying all of that, self acceptance as we move into a deeper knowing space of who we really are, and not conforming to oppression which is riddled with anxiety and understandably so (I’ll talk about this another time), the presence that is required developed with consistent practice is needed to live this depth of earth practice, of ancestral work and liberation and of self love.
If you don’t know how to manage your traumas and you will experience triggers, which we fukn do anyway loves, you slip back into the people pleasing oppression which this wild track of a walk is not about.

My point, self acceptance isn’t just screaming to the world I accept myself, but realising the work and depth it means to really accept and love yourself because when we’re still skimming the surface of our own personal growth and evolution, in too many ways we’re conforming to societal and patriarchal expectations still, (the whole plastic niceness bullshit is one small example), and let me also add in cultural expectation. It’s not until we stand in the darkest place within ourselves, live and love ourselves there do we really know what real self acceptance is.

For those that want to go darker, deeper come on over to Muma Padurri Facebook page but please read the pinned post before clicking like, it’s not for everyone..

LInk to Facebook page —-> Muma Padurii

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Artist unknown, amazing fucking piece

The Dark

You may not like what you see when I take off my skin and show you the darkness of who I really am within the layers of perception that you choose to see through your own eyes. It’s not bad, and it’s not good, it is whoever I am in the blackness of this depth that is both life and death and everything in between.
This bullshit authenticity most speak, is riddled with insecurity to be the real difference they are. But what if I told you, the deeper you go you will exceed your own expectations of who you think you are and who think you will be. This ‘I love everyone’ shit isn’t truth. You can feel the love of the mystery and connection to all and be devoted to it because it’s what you are made of, but you don’t love everyone, because you don’t know everyone and there’s a lot of people that you won’t even like.
It’s not till you sit deep in the nothingness that is everything many many times will know who you are, and you’ll find it will confront many to be unapologetically raw and goodness has a fierceness and darkness that can be churned and it changes very quickly.
You become the very darkness you’re devoted to, this love affair with the mystery cannot and does not fit into an expectation of any box. It is the very essence of nature changeable, wild, feral and free.
I am not who you think I am.
Solstice love to all xx
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Muma Pădurii

The chaotic nature of the energy that has created all, is always moving and we can only experience those extremes as much as we can in human skin. We will never fully comprehend what it actually is and the further you go you really see you don’t know much at all.

Though how much of you do you think you’re healing if you avoid the aspects of nature that is confronting and scary as fuck? How well can you stand in the eye of your own storm and not lose yourself? Losing yourself consciously is a different thing altogether, but I’m talking where most people can’t see at all through the beliefs they hold onto. So fixated, they stay in darkness without knowing how to see when they are in it. Yes, it’s a practice.

Most people tend to avoid talking about death, chaos and destruction. Always fearing the next bit of change, not accepting the chaotic nature that life is. Forever fearing their own shadow. Even in witchcraft, not much different unfortunately, yet it’s the beautiful vast mystery we learn to stand in through our relationship with nature and self.

Why this. This new space I have created for those that are curious, the ones that are ready, or the ones that love it as much as I do. This space is breathing, waiting for the right time to begin. It’s shiny and new. And it’s all for curse, hex, death, chaos and destruction. Can’t grow if ya can’t accept all facets of life. Can’t be rooted in your practice if you fear death and destruction.. so here ya go loves, the Facebook page is ready and I will share it again and again. Nothing’s posted on it just the presence of Muma Pradurii she’s waiting…… Click here if ya good to go dark and fucking filthy right in the destruction of deathly chaos ———> Muma Padurii

Artisit depiction of Muma Pădurii


The Rage

It’s a quiet a simmer
That rage
Each time you drop in deeper and deeper still
It’s nails digging into a wound you’ve done everything to protect
Wide open
Forever picking at the stitches
Masking it with the right words and behaviours
So no one can ever see what you’re afraid of seeing
This rawness you want to stay hidden
Yet it festers and it grows
A rage so big you want it to consume you
Oh and you do
You want nothing more than to show the world how dark it is in here, don’t you?

You don’t fear death and you don’t fear pain
You fear being trapped
Living an existence that you know isn’t fucking real
But you’re too afraid of not fitting in with the same fucking clones out there
The same ones masking the same bullshit
So you pretend, and keep pretending
Then soon, here and there it starts to slip
That rage of yours
You say something that’s out of your ‘character’
And it drives you to pick that fight, say exactly what’s on your mind
Fucking conjure that chaos
Get revenge..and it’s all fucking delicious and you mean it don’t you..

We’re both smiling now aren’t we..

Part of you wants to drive that knife in
But a bigger part of you wants to be free
It’s freedom.
Freedom to be yourself
No matter how dark
How fucking weird, how offensive it may be to some
You just want to breathe
To know what it’s like to be the real you without giving a flying fuck what anyone thinks..

And if you got this far, that isn’t a big ask
To be you
To be free
That rage is asking you something over and over again
It doesn’t go away because there’s always more, there’s always more..
Are you listening?
Because the only person you need to confront,
The only person you really need to love, to commit and not abandon
To be present to be that freedom, to know..

Is you.

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Artist- Guy Denning, 1965

Peeving – False positivity and how it fucks with healthy relating

So some of you know me, and you know I can’t stand the love and light fake fuckery spiritual shit show. It’s irritating, fake and smothered in denial of what is serious emotional pains and issues that need to be addressed with constant presence, and not swept under the meme rug, picking up the right ‘spiritual’ lingo say a few fucken ‘right’ phrases that’s been repeated endlessly by thousands of others, and then keep shutting down every person in their way that feels any other feeling and emotion that isn’t positive or happy. Fuck off cunts.


Before I explain further let me share with you two posts I posted on my Instagram page, the first hit a few people hard I got messages, some polite and some not so polite which I welcomed, because yeah being called a cunt is more real than the polite bullshit I received. Think I’m a cunt, well I think you’re one too, a fake cunt because you’re all happy la la on your page but you didn’t want to cite your anger on my page in case it was seen. I rest my case. So here’s the first –



‘I know I’m not the only one feeling this, because the constant masking of positive bullshit is just that.
How is everyone posting positive shit when most of us are rage full and depressed? Wouldn’t it be a breath of fresh air to just talk out whatever you’re feeling without putting a positive twist on every little fucking thing.
I get the growth and the love, but love isn’t all growth and warm hugs. Sometimes it’s a kick in the cunt out of nowhere and it’s painful, messy, fierce and can be destructive as fuck at times and I’m talking about the relationship with just yourself.
You want real, then put a bit of real behind it which means being honest. Not a carefully thought out constructed over share with spiritual fuckery all over it. I’m writing this in bed eating my raw pudding and it’s awesome by the way. Show the world who you really are. Let’s have some real talk.
I read somewhere last night some woman that I don’t know saying she’s learning how to make love to her heart. Really? Fucking really now? I’m gonna go make love to this pudding right here and I know I’m not the only one sick and tired of the BULLSHIT.
Night all 🍧

This isn’t taking a dig and standing on my soap box with my cunt stick, this is serious. Why? because this fucks with healthy relating. Let me share the second Instagram post I posted hours later and I’ll explain. So here ya go…

FullSizeRender (46)

‘I pissed people off with my previous post (yes via message mostly) and I say fucking fantastic. This is the problem. Everyone wants to post agreeable shit, positive la la crap where does that get anyone and anywhere and it nowhere gets you near real positivity. Most of it is masking some deep and serious wounds beneath it all, trauma wounds that’s just being replayed over and fucking over again washed over with an image, talk the lingo and there you go ya spiritual. Of course you’re not.
Where’s your vulnerability, the honesty the realness of who you are in it all? The mess.
How do we really know if we really like one another and really get on if we only ever show one side of ourselves? If we don’t have the backbone to be and say what we feel,  and what we think?
Where’s the real relating going on here, the challenge and growth of it?
I see all the time people believing they’re great friends until they see another side of the person or they realise they don’t agree on every little thing. Yes it’s fucking okay not to.
I would never want anyone to think I’m nice and kind because I’m not. I’m not just that. I can be, but I also can be a cunt. No one is nice all the time, that’s anxiety. And here lies the problem of fake fuckery.
The fear of who you really are. That wound that tells you to be good and agreeable all the time, it’s huge isn’t it.’


Right, so let me go into it more. From day one we’re taught what’s good and what’s bad, but over time we’re taught and shamed that natural human qualities, feelings, thoughts, and emotions are bad so don’t express that shit like anger, grief, unhappiness, rage, fear anything that doesn’t fit the happy I’ve got my shit together box. We’re manipulated to feel guilty if we’re feeling, thinking or expressing an opinion that doesn’t fit this little shitty box, so what most do is convince themselves that everything’s okay even though they’re breaking inside. They put a smile on their face even though they’re raging, they keep quiet when they really want to scream for help and this cunt society has done that. If you’re one of those cunts, please check yourself, we are damaging one another loves.

So every time someone says something that isn’t positive or empowering or has a different opinion they’re shut down, shamed a lot of the time instead of having those uncomfortable conversations that isn’t a quick fix which most people are addicted to, you know the anxiety that’s attached to hiding who we really are.

There’s no real relating going on, no one is showing who they really are because everyone’s afraid of being judged or rejected and the shaming is getting worse therefore no healthy relating or expression is happening because no one is showing who they really are. Think about some people you’ve met and gotten to know, and maybe you showed parts of yourself choosing to be vulnerable and they walked away from you or had a problem with it, sound familiar? That’s the bullshit I’m talking about. I’m not talking about toxic behaviour here, that’s another thing.

Everyone seems to be offended by every little thing that what’s being created here is a shut down of humanity, of real humanness. Real discussion and more importantly relating. Without real relationships and vulnerability without the toxic bullshit of course, this is why people are hungry for real connection, because there is none, but in saying that you have to be okay with feeling uncomfortable at times and have those conversations you’ve been taught not to have and more importantly showing the hidden parts of you, that you’ve been shamed to believe are bad or don’t fit.

I’ll leave it here, food for some serious as fuck thought loves. This is serious because without the real and raw, it’s going to spill over which it has and continuing to and we’re destructing at a rapid rate, it’s become toxic and our earth which is all of us is suffering for it.

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Hexing and Cursing – pt 1 

This week I’m going to talk about hexing and cursing to clear up any misunderstandings around it and why it’s included in the path of the wild. First I want to say, evolution of a person does not mean a perfect person which seems to include a distorted perception you must be nice all time to be loving but if you’re making yourself believe that you’re a nice person while pushing down who you are and how you really feel, you’re fooling yourself. 

If you’re choosing to be ‘nice’ while your insides are screaming wanting to smack the person in front of you, think about where that rage goes when there’s no expression. 

I hope that in itself has grabbed your attention and if you’re offended by that then I say to you, be honest with yourself. It’s human nature to be either. Not one person on this planet can run from that truth. I don’t like separating our nature into bad and good, but for the purpose of this discussion lets do that. 

Interconnectedness. Every living being and creation is connected. We’re created from the same mysterious energy so we know there’s no separation. What we do think, feel, say, behave, creates ripples through this mysterious living organism we call life. 

Know this when you think heavy negative thoughts. Carrying it in your body unexpressed will still effect your life whether you’re conscious of what you’re feeling and doing or not. It has an energy of its own and we’ve all experienced and know this. 

Witches are seekers of truth. I’m not talking about Instagram witches with pretty pictures or those that love to recite knowledge from books of other people’s experience of witch or state certain mythologies from cultures pretending they know. I’m talking about self awareness, growth as a person, real evolution where you die quite a few times to live your own life that isn’t controlled by expectation and behavioural patterns. I’m talking raw wildness. That raw wildness is nature, our nature and how we choose to live this power, and it is such a power when we live from this wild place how it’s expressed is our own free will but you’ve died a few times to get here so you know very well how far you can push the edges of your own power before losing your footing. It’s freedom but one that has a lot of responsibility and one that comes from a loving place. Love is both fierce and soft. Expression of both is needed and necessary. 

Wildness, nature, this mysterious energy that is life can swing from one extreme to another and this is where I bring in duality because in its extreme it looks dual but it isn’t. When we choose to put our all into expressing whatever we feel at the time it carries both. So if you choose to cast what you think is white magic think again. Your intention is to do ‘good’ but know there’s a hidden place within every human being that is endless full of unknown territory and unresolved suppressed emotion that is fuelling your magic. The more you choose to grow, your intention becomes sharper, clearer and much more focused and your magic is stronger without self awareness and growth what you cast out you’ll learn from even if it breaks you. The ‘white’ witches I have met over the years fear the hidden self which adds to the energy behind what they may think is clear intention. Without self awareness and dying a few times at the very least, how can you really know yourself? How do you know how much of who you really are, how much of your power are you oppressing? 

And to those people who don’t believe in hexing and cursing or believe it shouldn’t be practiced or worse still make a woman feel bad for it, I ask you – how many times have you died to really know nature and the real nature of who you are? And if you think you know, then you’ll know, our nature can be both cruel and loving. No three fold bullshit lives here, it’s survival of the strongest. 

Death has a way of fucking off what isn’t real. It’s painful, messy and it breaks you open. Feels like something gnawing at you till you give in to the truth of what actually is. This brutal wildness unhinges your true nature. It shows you who you really are without the mask of being nice because you’re so afraid to be rejected. It shows you life without fucking buffers. 

To be continued.