The Sickness & Sensationalism of Witch and Shaman Aesthetic

Yes, it’s a sickness. Fuck yeah it is a sickness. The ones that don’t really know anything. The ones that need smoke and mirrors around because at the core of it, it’s attention seeking driven be a deep insecurity of not knowing who they are and their unresolved wounds.
I always say, compare it to our ancestors, how earthed and grounded is each person that claims witch or shaman?  Not hard to see it, not hard to smell it. Always remember, the focus of earth practices is connection and healing. Anyone real in who they are and what they do, does not need the smoke and mirrors and the fanfare of bullshit marketing to look like something they are not.
When we speak of witch or shaman, anyone in the healing arts, it’s rooted to the earth. Rawness. There’s an intrinsic understanding of human nature and connectedness that you feel when you’re in their presence or when you read their words.

Anyone can research through reading other people’s books, reword shit and claim it as their own filling in the gaps with their perpetual rubbish and a tiny amount of intuition.
Earth practices when it’s real, breaks you open over and over again offering the wisdom, knowledge and understanding from the experience.
There’s not just one initiation with the mystery, which are significant growth points in a witch or shamans life that takes usually years to move through and within that is the medicine they are to share with the world growing into who they really are. It is painful, deep and a book can’t be written about it because it is that deep, and why would you want to share something so deeply personal of your own spiritual experiences? It is something you keep within family. Pass it to your children, teach them more about their ancestral gifts and threads. It’s not just a series of shitty events with a tiny bit of insight, it’s much more than that and would be impossible to know where to start to share if the person actually experienced it because now, the word initiation is being thrown around and here we have another word that holds fuck all essence.

The sickness of the superficial image of witch and shaman has a poison to it that many don’t understand or see, because when you get fuckers that are using the image to feed their neediness and lack of self awareness, their behaviour and words pull on on the neediness of others feeding the sensationalism they think this image is, and that stems back to a lack of healing. Pulling on open unresolved wounds of their audience keeping people from actually doing the real healing work that witch and shaman actually is.
Where there’s fuck all healing, our earth, which is all of us won’t heal keeping people disconnected from our planet.

Do you see this big ball of fake fuckery and the damage it is actually doing? Yet it should be the primary source of healing when known and practiced correctly.
Stop feeding the fuckery loves. The stupid books that makes no sense, the oracle cards and fucking dumb so called tours with a pack of tarot cards, no one with their feet on the ground does these things.
The realness of those that really do walk this, they want to keep it real because the focus is on healing community and our beloved planet.
Because we know that disconnected humans mean more pain for earth. That is not what we would ever encourage nor the limelight of self focused egotistical shit.

Know the difference.

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A New Dark

How often do you take the time to listen to the earth? Do you know how? How often do you spend time in nature, and if not why not?
There’s something stirring so deep that’s emerging, something I have never sensed before and one to take seriously. How it effects each person will be different, it all rests on how well you listen to yourself and how well you can grow from destruction.
Destruction isn’t something to fear, it’s part of nature. Shit needs to be rattled to find the truth and wisdom beneath the nicely put together picture, and this will happen many times over and let it. Welcome it in. Move with it and explore the rubble that’s left behind, what is it saying to you? What are you not getting?
There’s changes, and then there’s pay attention bitch because there’s a bigger picture here. That’s a fact, but most will find excuses to reason away what’s happening even though the message is clear and in our face. The fuckery is alive and well and we don’t have time for it.

I urge you to not get carried away with the glamour and superficiality of toxic bypassing, where people get caught up in the small self centred matters that mean fuck all in the bigger picture. Reasoning away what’s being spoken to us. The bigger picture is far more important. That glamour is fear. Fear of being so far away from the truth and it’s angry. It’s full of surface stuff of empty selfies, bullshit self pedestaling as narcissistic behaviours love to think they’re more than they’re not. It’s excusing shitty behaviour with some fucking spiritual belief to hide their irresponsibility. It’s all irritating and frustrating because that smell in the air to want more drama, is the drama of unaware humans lost in their fear and anger.
Getting caught up with appearances is all part of the glamour.. open your eyes loves.

I urge you to pay attention. To look at your life like you never have before and expand in ways you never thought of before. To pull your energy in and make your life have meaning with the right people and places. Quiet, and always listening to our Mother. We are nothing without her.
Everything that was shown to me has unfolded on the planet in the last 6-8 weeks has happened. The earth shifted last Thursday between 12-1pm WA time, and I was pulled right in. Clear, significant and not to be ignored. In the last two days I have been shown something else, this…the new dark. Something is stirring in the mystery like I’ve never felt before and it’s clear spoken communication that wants to support. Are you listening, are you paying attention?

Listen to your body, what is it saying? If you’re ready and want to make changes and not sure where to begin, get in touch….but let me say this because it needs to be said particularly as the toxicity is growing and a lot of people feel entitled to spew their shit on others.

You need to come to me with some experience with inner self exploration knowing how to introspect, be strong enough to feel and stand on your own. I don’t do toxic and privilege behaviours in any form, and don’t come to me if you don’t walk your integrity. I don’t have time for bullshit adult babies that want to be pandered on and not take responsibility for their behaviour.  I don’t take any shit. You approach me as witch with toxic behaviours and I’ll finish you as one. Be ready. Take yourself seriously and be responsible and I’ll take you seriously. Don’t waste my time when I could be supporting another in need that’s ready.
Contact form is here —> https://snakeandwildroots.com.au/pages/contact

Visit the official website here –> https://snakeandwildroots.com.au

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Transmuting with Bone Mother

Muma Padurii a Romanian myth that carries a similar story to Baba Yaga. She is the protector of trees and animals, women and children. The Bone Mother of the wild is playing Her part in present events and to come on the earth. The chaotic unrest has been building up for some time, with short and sometimes long sporadic spaces, nevertheless she is and will be more prominent in her actions on the planet in the very near future. This is not a scare tactic, but one we have all witnessed for some time, and unfortunately most is not paying attention or feeling so hopeless the destructive side of avoidance seems to be all to many.

Chaos and destruction, how do you feel about it? How well can you stand in it and still see while managing becoming the storm? I’ve read articles with titles ‘that we’re made for these times’ and a very big part of that is true, but are you ready? When so many people choose not to embrace the chaotic and destructive side of their nature how well do you really navigate outside influences that is provoking your inside world, and not reacting but feeling it all and making decisions that are important with clarity? Because you’re going to need that skill.

People get angry because maybe they don’t want to see reality for what it is, or maybe they’re just not ready to… either way we all need to be. Four weeks ago, I was shown clear visions of what’s to come and the chaotic changes in the natural world done by the human hand will be more and obvious within this time frame. It’s all come true and there’s more to come, but what’s also obvious She’s letting me know to prepare.

As I travelled deep in the last few weeks, what I have noticed that more of the fierce nature of woman is coming to the surface which for few reasons needs to be. One, for what’s to come and the other, the women that are deeply connected with awareness with earth, is feeling the chaos rise and move within her like a ball of fire. Preparing for a breaking open like never before, not pretending it’s not there but allowing to be swallowed whole and spat out like the fucking warrior you are.

Chaos, destruction, natural movement doesn’t have boxes or schedules. We move with the earth not the other way around, and if you haven’t learned that yet, you will. The patriarchal structure has no place in natural law, sorry but She’s gonna fuck it up.

Visit the official website: https://snakeandwildroots.com.au

Reclaim your power with one on one sessions here: https://snakeandwildroots.com.au/pages/reclamation-of-power-services

Shamanic healing and ancestral witchcraft services: https://snakeandwildroots.com.au/collections/cunning-folk-work

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Our Earth, Our Collective Trauma

Each time you don’t stand for yourself, allow a person to disrespect, take advantage or abuse who you are or the kindness you offer, you’re also giving them permission to treat your ancestors the same way, because you are your ancestors.
This is your family, the bedrock that you are. An expression of earth that holds thousands of years of wisdom, and if we take this to the shamanic practice of each culture that has it’s own way of connecting and gathering information to heal and deepen the relationship to the land, you can sense the ancient aliveness that is demanding our presence. And without that presence, we will and are getting sick.
It’s plugging who we are into the source of nature in order for earth to be healthy, which is all of us.
Feel into that, and you can only really know when you have developed a strong relationship with your ancestors, self and earth because I can speak this to people and they look at me like I’m speaking a foreign language, painful.

So what I want to say is, most of us don’t live on the land we are from. I really want to encourage the seriousness of being a strong ally to the indigenous people that are the true caretakers of that patch of earth you are living on, and please do not further our trauma by disrespecting our feelings when it comes to any discussions about land and what rightfully needs protecting and preserving.

Noticed I said our trauma. It is not just the trauma of the culture that is voicing their pain, but it is ours collectively because standing their and barking otherwise to a people that is fighting to heal and protect the earth they are, is a collective pain. The ones making insensitive bullshit comments are in their own cultural trauma and don’t know it, which is more destructive.

The relationship to the patch of earth you are from is a connection and relationship that is the very bones of who you are. That’s a truth, and if you don’t feel or understand this yet, keep healing.

So many people don’t remember this and still living the pain and toxicity of believing another story other than living their roots. The more we come back home to who the fuck we really are, the more each person will know and understand this. Be respectful and kind even if you don’t quite understand. Don’t bark hurtful bullshit but explore whatever pain it hits for you. Ask questions but be sensitive, kind and respectful. Taking this seriously will also open the doorway for you to return and reclaim your own ancestral roots.
We are all indigenous to a patch of earth, connecting with our own pain first will offer the understanding needed for us to ALL heal.

Visit the official website: https://snakeandwildroots.com.au
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Traits of a Spiritual Narcissist- (pt 1)

I’ve been reading and healing people for a long time. I started reading when I was 16. I was born with the natural gift of sight and mediumship ability and I love what I do. My healing abilities ‘woke’ when I was 25 and I began body sessions offering my services to begin with for no exchange. So a long while. I’m 44 this year and I’ve seen it all in so called spiritual communities and I’m sick and tired of it. Actually that’s an understatement.
From toxic narcissistic practitioners to clients that are just the same. This will never stop, because toxic clients that are stuck in their patterns and will always be seeking attention only to avoid their issues, and toxic and narcissistic practitioners will always be in any spiritual community because it’s a strong supply of attention and pedestaling they need to survive. First I want to say, not all toxic people are narcissists but all narcissists are toxic.
So I’m going to begin with what toxic and narcissistic behaviours to look for in practitioners, then also what practitioners should watch out for in clients.
There is a big difference with a person wanting to acknowledge and heal toxic behaviours and this absolutely can be done, but a toxic person that either isn’t ready to, or just doesn’t want to which can edge on narcissistic traits. We all know narcissism cannot be healed. This will be a two part blog loves, there’s a bit I want to share.

Let’s start with narcissism in practitioners, healers, readers, ‘spiritual leadership’ also transformational workers, tantric workers, witches, shamans, new age whatevers, and of course counsellors, art therapists, psychologists and psychiatrists..it just goes on and on. It’s anywhere and everywhere.

There are different types of narcissists and I’ll cover the main ones I have witnessed in spiritual communities. Please know, some of these can overlap. This is just a bit of helpful knowledge for you, and one to observe to keep yourself safe. It’s a deep concern of mine as someone that heals. This does not help heal the earth which is all of us, and I encourage for you to keep growing your self awareness and be committed to your healing practice so you don’t find yourself in this position over and over again.

Traits of a narcissist 

This describes the classic narcissist, and these traits are included in the covert and the inverted narcissist which I will mention.
Let’s not forget the malignant narcissist which can be well hidden within spiritual communities too.

Classic narcissists are attention seekers who love to brag about their accomplishments and absolute expect others to flatter and compliment them. How often I’ve witnessed this behaviour in spiritual communities is outstanding.
Can be from the smallest thing of ‘I bought a new car to look at my new tattoo.’  Then we have the ‘I’ve been a practitioner for X amount of years’ and they tend to mention this often which makes them feel it gives them dominance over the profession, that they know it all so please everyone stand up and clap.
They’re the ones that love the constant selfies and sharing really personal information that may or may not be true. They love the spotlight and will use anyone or anything to get it. They love to name drop and they have this air to them that you absolutely should be putting them on the pedestal because in their mind they are better than you. The more knowledge they accumulate, they more they expect this.
They love conversations to be about them, and them only and can get jealous really easily though they may not show it. They just may ignore you or down play your own achievements, or even pick at the faults of what you have achieved.
They get bored easy, and there’s always the next something to do which of course will be announced so they can get a standing ovation for it.
You are their supply of self importance and any need they want fulfilled.
They don’t apologise for anything because they don’t believe they have to. They usually have a really polished public appearance as well.

Observe communication. Is it warm? Does it have a disconnection feel to it where it lacks connection? Or does it lack boundaries. It’s usually one or the other or both.
Is there a harshness in their communication and demeanour?
Are they pushy, controlling and get angry when you do, believe of say something wrong that doesn’t justify that kind of response?
Do they talk themselves up a lot?
Whether online or in person, observe their moods and their openness or lack of.

Most importantly listen to how your body feels when you speak with them, whether in person or online.
The thing is, with narcissists they can put on this front that everything about what and who they are is exciting, and if you stand back and watch, most people will react in this way feeding their supply. Though the thing is, it’s not excitement you’re feeling. It’s adrenalin. Adrenalin from having your trauma wounds poked, then what I’ve observed is people want to part of their life or circle to feed what most people think is excitement but it isn’t. This want, is a want to be acknowledged from the trauma wounds that’s been poked, and the more they poke at it, you’ll find that you want their attention more and more. This is when you’ll see the empty and desperate compliments feeding the narcissist, and there you have it my loves, the toxic cycle goes around and around.

Narcissists are desperate to feel important. So is a person that’s had their trauma wounds poked, and are not aware of their wound triggers. So you see how unhealthy and concerning this is and I am certain you’ve witnessed this more than once.

So let’s throw in the traits of a malignant narcissist, who is highly manipulative. Their primary focus is to dominate and control others and will use aggression, deceit and will lie to get their way. They usually have this cruel streak and have no empathy or remorse when hurting others. Please remember many of these traits can overlap.

I’ve just outed a narcissist and watched her flounder around trying her best to cover herself. After purposely using the word gypsy to hurt myself and my daughter with no remorse knowing our ethnicity (gypsy is a slur word towards Romani people) I watched her first aggressively and with no empathy push the issue. The woman’s also pale so there’s privilege in this behaviour too, but narcissists believe they’re entitled to special treatment.
I watched from aggression, to panic after I made a video about it, and as a clinical psychologist pointed out her behaviour and she shut down her reviews on her page. After she watched the video, she reinstated everything to save face, but then went on to write about that she’s a narcissist slayer yet has never spoke about the issue which I have screenshots of, to going back and manipulating people with her personal issues so people can pity her, then back to selfies, smearing with bullshit on other racial issues yet no problem to rip down a race of people that is deeply oppressed to cover her arse. It’s all fuckery but only those that are self aware and actively working on healing themselves and their trauma wounds will see this.

The traits of a covert narcissist is more passive aggressive in nature, and many miss seeing they’ve been manipulated. Though in saying that, a lot if this can be missed because you may not be having a personal relationship with any of these people but I always say loves, if you walk away from any person feeling confused, doubtful of who you are, not feeling good about yourself, emotionally heavy and anxious, you’ve more than likely been manipulated. You may agree with them then and there, but that’s more out of a shock response because your trauma wound has been poked at and clearly you’ve experienced this before. So you may walk away feeling like ‘what the fuck just happened,’ a dazed and an emotionally heavy feeling. The grief will follow suit a little later because this is how the trauma wound of those that have been manipulated one too many times and this wound usually stems from their childhoods.
So you could be in session with covert narcissist or just in conversation with them, but you’ll know after you’ve walked away from one.

The last one is the inverted narcissist.
Now the inverted narcissist is a covert and vulnerable narcissist that actually needs to make connections with other narcissists to feel special. So you may see this in spiritual circles where there’s more than one leading a workshop or whatever, or just need to be seen together. These narcissists are codependent on other narcissists and usually have experienced severe childhood abandonment. Nevertheless, they have these traits along with the usual narcissistic traits and can pull on the opinions of other narcissists to shame you, and it becomes bullying in the sense that how you feel is wrong and isn’t important, and I know many many people have experienced this in spiritual circles.

Toxic traits in spiritual practitioners has a lot to do with shaming a person with how they feel and lack boundaries. They are passive aggressive and aggressive as well. Their communication isn’t clear, and they have trouble saying what they really mean, so their communication will always feel like there is an undertone to what they actually are saying, and you’ll feel this unease. It’s also a feeling like you owe them something for helping you. They emanate a poisonous feel and is always pulling people down, are highly aggressive, manipulative, but can also play the victim really well. You will know by how they make you feel. It’s challenging to be around these people for long lengths of time. The difference between toxic behaviour and a narcissist, is toxicity has troubled and wounded behavioural patterns that stem from childhood but can be healed, where as a narcissist is a personality disorder and is a mental illness. People can have narcissist traits and not be a narcissist also. Usually these traits tend to stand in certain situations because they believe a certain something they refuse to let go which points out the wound pretty clearly. It’s really important to know the difference so the term narcissist isn’t the next thing to smear a person with. It’s serious and should be spoke about seriously.

Before I end this, I need to make clear that narcissists are also highly intuitive. I don’t know why people think they are not because you need intuition to manipulate and read people very well to maintain a false image. Narcissists are usually created from deep traumas from childhood, so a need for high senses is where intuition is strengthened. So please keep this in mind. Mix it with knowledge from books, and it’s a pretty potent mix to have in alternative communities.
I hope this gives you some helpful knowledge because it is a huge problem everywhere not just in spiritual communities it’s just there are a lot of vulnerable people seeking help that can be manipulated too easy. Will be back soon for blog number two. Don’t forget to visit my offical website here –> https://snakeandwildroots.com.au
With love xx
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The Other Side of Privilege

I’m a proud multicultural woman. I love my roots and where I come from. I have spent the past weeks publicly educating people that gypsy is a slur word after white privilege pushing the issue.

After dealing with a racial situation in more ways than one, I could feel the other part of me being pulled in. I wanted to go back to my shamanic roots and reconnect with the mixture of Asian roots that I am proudly from. I’m still in it. Transforming, learning, growing, listening. To be at peace and be with what I know is real. It’s a painful waste of time to defend the bones of who you are. I wish there was no need for it. 

But I want to talk racism. The systems we live under in Australia. It’s a fact and unless you’re ethnic or indigenous to this land, you wouldn’t know any better. 

I want to start with saying, my grandfather that I never met is Romani. My daughters father has Jewish Romani blood and was also affected by the privilege of one particular person that pushed the issue and continued to use the word gypsy. Instead of an apology, white privilege pushes the issue, why? Because she can. She knew she would have the support of other privileged people. Privilege sees, ‘how dare I pull up a pale person on using the word gypsy?’ ‘Privilege screams, ‘I’m no victim’ instead of seeing that this is a humanity issue. This is not the only example and I can line up my fellow Roma’s and we all have stories to tell. Romani people are still very much oppressed in Europe. It is only now people are slowly listening and understanding gypsy is a slur word. It is only in the last three or four years people are slowly listening to what we have to say. Sad, but true. 

The beautiful thing in my experience, is minority groups stick together. I’ve had plenty of chats and support from other cultures not to mention the Romani groups I am part of and the people I know. I can’t tell you how much this helps the heart. There’s a presence and an understanding that doesn’t require words. A genuine heart connection of ‘I got you.’ I also want to shout out to the beautiful loves that have surrounded me and my daughter on this issue. You know who you all are. I appreciate you all for giving me the care and understanding to speak up. For supporting us and showing me your humanity. It only brings people closer and I’m grateful for it. Some of you also may not see it as a big deal because the word gypsy has been romanticised and it is not what most people think it is. But this post isn’t about explaining this again. If you want to know head over here: Romani Alliance 

This is about racism and pale privilege. My parents came over to Australia by ship and met over here. To sum it up, my mother is mixed European and Romani and my father is mixed Asian. Both speak more than one language. Both have accents. My mother is pale and my father is what most people will describe as black but I call him brown because that’s what he is. I’ve never met a black person but varying shades of brown. 

I have watched both of my parents experience racism. Every member of my family has and for myself personally I still do. These systems we live under are created for pale people to benefit from and for the rest of us to believe a skin colour is better than the rest. This toxic belief has ripped through cultures with such ferocity. And many pale skinned people still live by this, and there are many that are working through this trauma and toxicity and I say thank you, because you’re healing more than yourself. Because it is a trauma to believe one colour of the earth is better than the other. It is a trauma to have your own culture destroyed to believe in something that not only keeps you from knowing who you really are, but the pain of not knowing your ancestors and your own roots. I can understand this can be a reason why people hold onto what they have been taught, but I say to you friend- go deeper. For you, for the earth, for all of us. 

I have a tonne of experiences to share but I’ll just point out a few foundational ones. When I was six, my father came home bleeding and bruised because eight pale European men he worked with waited for him to finish night shift and beat him so bad he couldn’t see out of his eyes leaving his face and much of his body bruised and swollen. Why? because he’s brown and Asian. I remember how that made me feel, and it does affect you. The first four years of schooling I was picked on by the same four white girls that called me derogatory names for having brown skin. This started when I was five and didn’t end until I left the school. I was pushed by two of them and cut my head open the exact outcome they wanted. How do I know? Because they laughed as blood was dripping down my face. I’ll never forget the hatred behind it. My brown skin made them sick. Every day they told me I was disgusting. They weren’t punished, and it won’t come to any surprise to you one of their mothers called me a racist derogatory name and denied it when my mother confronted her. Said I imagine it. Not only racist, but too scared to be honest about it when confronted. 

My next primary school more white kids told me that my brown skin was disgusting and it wasn’t till my indigenous brothers and sisters pulled me aside and said, ‘don’t worry sis you come hang out with us.’ They’re understanding and compassion saved me as my rage grew over through my teenage years because this shit didn’t lessen and not because it was just my personal experience. I hate racism. I don’t understand how people can hate so hard even with all the reasoning and trauma experiences behind it. I don’t understand this kind of hatred. 

I watched pale men speak to my mother likes she’s stupid because she has a strong accent. Like she’s their property for them to sleaze over hoping for a fuck. In my late teens I would go out with my father and have pale skinned men look at my father like he’s a piece of shit and that some how he’s taking advantage of me. I would walk past them and yell ‘he’s my fucking father’ most of them would look away embarrassed. I bring this up because this is what I now experience with my daughter. She’s 19, paler skin than myself and every time we go out I am looked at like I’m abusing her. We don’t know any of these people and of course they don’t know our relationship. It hurts her and I try not to let it bother me. All the people that look at us that way have pale skin. So unless your ethic or indigenous you really don’t know how alive and well white privilege is.  And majority of those that scream ‘go back to your country’ have pale skin and they’re not even in their own country, go figure. 

My indigenous brothers and sisters have been nothing but understanding. What does that say about the toxicity in this country? And the people running it and the people benefiting from the systems that are in place to feed this separation and toxic belief? 

The thing is with racism it cuts bone deep and shouldn’t exist. No person is more than a tree or animal or another person. We’re all earth. Everything else is trauma I believe this wholeheartedly because when you’re deeply and authentically connected to your own roots, there’s no racism you just see beauty. That kind of connection and evolution looks at difference with curiosity and not hate. We’re all indigenous to a patch of land. It’s all beauty. 

This piece below I found powerful and want to leave it with you. This is necessary for all of us to heal.Blog post, not long and written by a recovering racist. I share because this covers so much from a pale person that explains her privilege and what she was taught. It’s worth the read: https://www.patheos.com/blogs/ecopreacher/2019/01/recovering-racist/utm_content=buffercb20e&utm_medium=social&utm_source=facebook&utm_campaign=FBCP-PRX

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The Depth of Real Healing

Let me put this out there and I will keep saying it because most people still don’t understand this.
Majority of my work is focused on healing, but reclaiming who you really are and giving love and presence to your wounds isn’t and shouldn’t turn you into a love and lighter. Someone that consistently sees positive only and always talking about love. You’ve all read those posts of everything is about love and it goes on and fucking on.
And it is about love, but not in the way most people understand and manipulated to think what love is and certainly not the above.

It’s not being a fucking door mat. It’s not about taking people’s shit and pretending it doesn’t bother you. It’s not about consistently seeing the good in people and only focusing on the ‘good’ bits when a person is a cunt, let’s be real here. All of those things is dissociation and screams that a person is fearing confrontation, fears the ability to stand for him or herself, shows there’s a need to go much deeper to heal than what you think you have. It also shows whatever you’re choosing to believe whether it’s a ‘spiritual’ belief or a conditioned one, is part of a wounded behavioural pattern and is creating more pain for you.

Let me lay this out for you as clear as I can.
Our wounds and traumas is part of who we are now. Regardless of how much self awareness you place around it and the reclamation you receive from it, it’s there for life. That’s a truth. It lessens over time with more presence, love and attention when you learn to love and live from the wounded place which is the real you within the pain.

We keep growing from these contracted places of energy and we’re meant to. I see and know that’s why our traumas are there. Yes it’s shitty and it’s painful but we’re all human and we all have them. They are not separate from you, they are you. Pieces of you that have been hurt, contracted energy that requires love, presence and focused attention to grow and receive wisdom and insight from.

Within these places of contracted energy, it feels more tumultuous and darker because they are contracted, so energy that is pulled in. When energy isn’t flowing in its natural state it hurts. That hurt can grow if there’s no consistent attention around it. Regardless, there will always be these places within us that when triggered, will pull us back into what feels like a wound. If we don’t work on our self awareness and presence we then fall back into trauma patterns.

Saying all of that now, within these dark contracted places when a person goes fucking deep with their healing and learn to love themselves there, they also see and understand the raw state of nature without the layers and expectations of conformity.
It’s wild, feral, fierce and loving. But within that loving place is a side of human nature most people ignore and don’t want to love. It is the truth of our nature that we can hurt others, be fucking cruel and kill. Let’s not pretend here because excusing it away isn’t seeing nature for what she really is.

When you learn to love and reclaim all of you, this is included and when healing is done right (yes there is many ways that isn’t which keeps people stuck in the superficiality of the wound and they continue to go round and around in patterns) you welcome this feral, raw twisted side of who you are and let him or her be part of your expression, you live it.

Now in most ‘spiritual’ belief systems, it’s consistently pushed this thing about love and it is about love but fuck, we need all of who we are to function and there are times when we need to do what we can to defend and look after ourselves and the ones we love. When we go bone deep with healing and knowing ourselves, we’re going to express and know this twisted and feral side of who we are and welcome it, love it.
So we wouldn’t put ourselves down for being cunty when needed because we’re loving and protecting ourselves when we do. So fuck the guilt off. The guilt is part of the wounded pattern in most situations. Raw nature is wild and untamed which is all of us. The balance of keeping yourself in check is always healing, staying present and rooted to the earth focusing on clear seeing.
Tired of reading this unrealistic view of self awareness which is doing nothing but creating more fear and widening self doubt feeding the wounds my loves. Meaning more people will be hurting, meaning less presence which means more destruction to the planet.

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Mongolian shaman